Monday, December 24, 2007

Christmas Eve

So it's Christmas Eve... I don't know what to do. Everyone is so content to be here with family and friends... yet I wish I were anywhere but here. I want my family and friends. A lot. So here is a list of things i'll miss this year... I love you all.

I miss wrapping the last of the christmas presents with my mommy
I miss sitting with friends and playing in the snow before the holiday
I miss having a big formal dinner with my family
I miss playing in the snow with my cousins
I miss reading the Best Christmas Pagent Ever
I miss singing for my family
I miss getting pj's on Christmas ever
I miss the shrimp and twice baked potatoes that my family will be eating tonight
I miss making reindeer food for my cousins
I miss sitting up at my Jan's cabin by the fire
I miss driving home in the snow
I miss christmas morning and having my sister come down at 8 to get me
I miss opening presents and eating pumpkin chocolate chip bread with the Macey's christmas day parade in the back ground
I miss Grandma and Grandpa coming over for coffee to watch us open their presents
I miss christmas brunch at kari's
I miss eating orange rolls and playing with a select few christmas presents
I miss going up to Jan's to play in the snow and building snowmen
I miss calling my britta marie to see if i can come visit
I miss walking into her house and yelling MERRY CHRISTMAS NYSTULS!
I miss relaxing with friends and eating left overs
I miss watched Scrooged with my parents
I miss New Years Eve traditions with britta
I miss Mnt Dew
I miss watching New Years Rockin Eve
I miss my Britta
I miss my Hannah
I miss my Lurpey
I miss my Brady Lee
I miss my Enano
I miss my Jebby
I miss my Besto
I miss my Michael
I miss my Randi Lynn
I miss my Ty Ty
I miss my Mommy
I miss my sister
I miss my Papa
I miss my Grandparents
I miss my Aunts, Uncles, and cousins
I miss everyone... Being alone on Christmas sucks... a lot

I'm thankful for all of you and I just want you all to know that you're in my thoughts... Best wishes and happy holidays.

Jo Crippleface

Sunday, December 23, 2007

Guten TaG!

hahah sooo I'm a slacker.. I know I know! SO... let's recap. ummm Brock and I flew into the airport, went through customs, blah blah blah. lame. lol it took for freaking ever! So when we got here and pulled up to the base, it was 10 am here.. where as in utah it was 2:00 am so we were freaking jet lagged. Unfortunately the best way for us to beat jet lag is to immediately adjust our sleep cycles to match the time zone which ment figuring out how brock and i were supposed to stay up until 9 p.m. this time. it was so hard! first we had to go and get military id cards so that we could get on and off of the base.. and that took FOR FREAKING EVER! then we came back and brock and i finally got to shower! huzzah! that was really nice. after ms nancy made us pho (vietnamese food in germany.. it makes sense?) haha jake, joe and adam decided to drag us downtown to the christmas market to try and keep us up. so after walking through the freezing cold, HUMID weather, we took the train downtown and walked through the booths and stuff. it was cold, everyone was really loud, there were the cutest little things, cider, lights, wonderful smells, it was so fun! it was like fairdays times a trillion!
SO the next day we got up and drove to southern germany to this small little town.. very touristy. i loved it, we stayed in this little bed and breakfast ran by this old couple, i played the piano and what not. We went out and walked around the market and had snichtzel and stuff (its actally really really really good!) i have a new favorite food... schneeballen (it means snow ball?) its yummy you dip it in hot chocolate (schoko) and its wonderful. we went through the medieval criminal museum (brady lee i thought of you the entire time and took a million pictures!) it was pretty sweet... and so the first full day past.
We got up the next morning and drove to nuschwiensien castle (its the one that disney fashioned cinderella's castle after) it was gorgeous! we toured the lower hunting lodge before taking a horse drawn carridge up the mountain to the castle. it was amazing. everything was so decorative and elaborate, though it was freezing! after we toured the castle we drove to the next little lodge.. Hauss Lilli it was run by this tiny old bavarian woman and she fed us a lot and we just kind of ran around. lol at like 11 at night brock and i were craving chocolate so we ran down the road to the gas station and were praying that the lady there spoke english. though she did, when we got back we were locked out! we set off the bells and it was just a huge mess. lol it was so funny.. me and brock.. unsupervised in germany... hahaha
Ok so today we woke up and drove to Austria to tour a little bit! The alps are wondeful! the ski lodges were so amazing and i wanted to hit the slopes sooo bad! hahahaa i'm so jealous of how much snow utah has right now, they don't have nearly as much.. maybe a foot. lammmmee. ok so after that we drove to Dachau (duckow).. it was the first concetration camp in germany. When you get to the gate you see a sign in german and it means Free Labor... the people who were sent there were told that it was a work camp, that they were taken there to make money. after i walked in my breath was immediately taken away, not in a good way. I was staring across an empty plane, there were guard towers all around and the temperature dropped as you walked in. The entire place felt evil. It felt that it was crushing your hope and draining the life just being there... it was so hard to breath. We walked around the barracks and it was horrible........ i dont know how to describe it. The entire thing was draining. the worst part was approaching the "red building" it was horrible.... i walked toward the building and my head started hurting... when i walked across the threshold my breath caught. We first walked through the room they stored dead bodies in.... next into the room with all of the ovens...... through the gas chambers.... another body room... and finally back outside. it was horrible. everyone was shaking and white as a sheet.... you walk through the rooms and you can imagine what happened and its completely sicking.... it pulls into perspective what humanity is really capable of. reading about it and seeing the actual place was completely different.
Ok so now we're finally home... I miss you all and I can't wait to get home. Happy Christmas!!! I love you all and you're always in my thoughts. Write back!

hugs and kisses,
Erin Jo

Sunday, November 25, 2007

You light up my life...


So last night Hannah and I went on a date with Joseph and Chad.. that was eventful. lol :) That is another story in and of itself though. The ending of that story is where this thought process begins. We went to Temple Square as the wrap up of our date last night and it really got me thinking... It's amazing how something so simple as Christmas lights can bring joy to so many people. I wasn't told where we were going last night so I neglected to bring a coat, so out there in my swim jacket freezing to death it finally hit me... Every action has an equal and opposite reaction, and each good deed, each little reaction sybolizes one of the points of light at Temple Square. By themselves they're a mini miracle, but they're mundane and often overlooked, but when you compile them, the ending picture is magical. It's amazing how thousands of Christmas lights can detach you from reality and put you in a place of enchantment. I guess life is funny that way. The moral of this story is to put things into perspective and think about what's important in your life. :)

All my love always,
Erin Jo

Sunday, November 11, 2007

I'm sitting by the window,
Waiting for the rain,
The tears are coming faster,
I'm choking on the pain,
The hate and lies that I've built up,
All come pouring down,
My discontent and envy,
Earns a disapproving frown,
I'm drowning in my heartache,
I'm choking on my tears,
I can't help but wishing,
I could feel you near,
You and me, forever to be,
You're always my best friend,
Unitl the day that you met him,
The beginning of the end,
They say that people come and go,
I never thought you would,
Other people came and went,
I never thought you could,
The day you left my heart broke,
You never saw my tears,
Now I'm left completely alone,
To deal with my fears.
Best friends should be forever,
What happened to us then?
I thought we'd be together,
Until the bitter end.
Now I wait in silence,
The tears have all run dry,
I will always remember,
How you left me for that guy.


Dedicated to my Enano, who is one of the few people in my world who is truely able to relate to this poem, with lots of love and thank you's for letting me sit on his bed and cry every Sunday and for never ever failing to make me feel better.

All my love,
Erin

Sunday, September 16, 2007

2007 Edition

Ok so it is time for the "Remember When" 2007 Edition...nice....

"Remember When"

We went to the Welcome Back Bonfire and I met you for the first time?

Remember how you were covered in Glow Sticks Gel?

Remember Reffing together?

Remember Seeing Step Up on our first date?

Remember our walk to talk to Rili and she asked if we were together...and you answered "almost"?

Remember Thanksgiving with your cousins?

Remember Tay Tay snorting powdered sugar?

Remember seeing the dolphins?

Remember meeting me at the air port?

Remember taking care of me on choir tour?

Remember talking until 3 am and getting up at 5?

Remember how much I cried and said I hated you but really never could?

Remember when we let him come between us?

Remember when we didnt?

Remember when we met at the swim meet?

Remember "It's my birthday"?

Remember trying to get to Jordan Landing and ending up really lost?

Remember when Jeb was the only one we weren't pissed at for getting us lost?

Remember the Miss Watch-ass Pagent?

Remember "Once I was a selfish fool who never understood, never looked inside myself but on the outside I looked good!"

Remember taking pictures in your room?

Remember the "Cleavage Shirt!"

Remember Les Miserables?

Remember drawing pictures of us all in my living room?

Remember watching CSI every Thursday religiously?

Remember me coming to get you at midnight and going on a drive just so we could scream?

Remember when I fell for him? Hard?

Remember when I showed you my secret spot?

Remember "Thats it. You're dead"

Remember "Hey girls who's that guy?"

Remember eating cake at exactly midnight while watching the meteor shower?

Remember meeting John Louis?

Remember taking me to the wedding?

Remember bathing together and sleeping together every night?

Remember how every night I fell asleep in your arms listening to the waves?

Remember when I ruined the movie ending for you?

Remember how many of us we managed to fit into the photo booth?

Remember meeting me for the first time and how I thought you were crazy?

Remember planning our 18 hour flight together?

Remember how we promised eachother forever...?

Remember how we haven't given up yet?

Remember how I love you and still haven't told you?

Remember when you slipped and told me that you loved me and then covered it up really fast and how i still dont know if you meant it?

Remember when we used to go to the lake every week?

Remember telling me how to wakeboard?

Remember idiot jousting?

Remember how I thought this summer was going to be epic..... it was.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxox
~En

Saturday, August 25, 2007

Thoughts from my head...

This is part of a letter I sent my youth director.... think about it.


So lately some of the problems have been thrown into light and impacted my life greatly.. and it's gotten me thinking about church. When things go wrong people tend to blame anything and everything but themselves, they use every little thing as an excuse not to go to church and every little bad thing that happens goes as a mark against God. It seems that in today's society that there is no room for spiritual belief, people want proof and cold hard facts. I've recently decided that the proof lies within yourself. That every beautiful thing, both good and bad, is proof that God exists and loves you if you choose to see it that way. God's love lies within all of us, we just have to make the choice to accept it. But whether or not someone chooses to accept it, and how one chooses to accept it doesn't deflect God's love from shining upone someone. Everyone has the potential to do great things, we just need to use our strengths, and the power of prayer is one thing we can count on.


So no matter if you're Baptist/Christian like Morgan-love, Catholic like Enano-bunny, Besto, and Randalynn, Lutheran like me, trying to discover what you believe like Britta and Lurpey, Agnostic like Egil, or Mormon like almost everyone else I know, we're all worshiping something out there, some sort of higher power. Have faith, no matter what happens, because it's when you lose faith that everything loses clarity.

All my love,
Erin-a-Jo aka Michelle Pickleface

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Again....Block Slacker

So random note: Jacob's sitting behind me and he just told me that I need to be shot in the face. Ouch. I'm sorry I haven't blogged in so long, I'm a huge blog slacker and I accept that. It just seems that another summer has flown by. I blinked and missed it. Lame. I'm ridiculously happy to be back in school though. I love it alot. And I know I'm going to stress, and I know that I'm going to end up killing Sarah Jane, but it's ok. It's all going to be worth it. I really heart my classes and everything. It's fabulous. So I don't really know what to write, my life's been so hectic for so long that I don't even know what's going on anymore. It's insane. Everything's changing so fast, I feel like I'm caught up in a whirlwind and who the heck know's what type of Oz it's going to drop me in. But here's an update for all those whom I haven't talked to in so long.
Stud Gov: Hell. But I still love it lots! I'm having so much fun!
Debate: I'm really excited to get into teaching it. It's going to kick butt!
Boys: Aren't worth my time currently. They just distract me and end up lying to me and hurting me. So not worth it.
Girls Night: I still need the dates everyone can do it in the next month so I can see what days that one place is open for that one thing.
Friends: I miss you! I never see anyone! Save me from this perpetual downward spiral!
School: Ummm since when was it ok for teachers to give this much homework the first week of school? Lame.
Piano: I seem to have reached a wall... I'm stuck! I need a piano tutor!
Voice: hahah I haven't been able to sing well in ages. It sucks.
Family: Lake Powell trip went exceedingly well...Everyone is currently getting along nicely.
Job: I heart my job so much! We have so much fun!
Swimming: I MISS IT! Time to get in the pool!
So I don't actually know what else is in my life besides the afore mentioned things..... ummm if I'm forgetting anything let me know and I'll give you the 411. Just let me know! And I solemly promise that hence forth I'm going to try and make a contrite effort to blog lots more often. :D I love you all until the end of time!

Infinite x's and o's
Jo Crippleface aka Michelle Pickleface ;)